Member-only story
Relationships | Emotional Availability
When Your Family Hinders Your Relationships
Realizing my family’s fears are hindering my romantic relationships and learning how to overcome these barriers
I started dating much later in life than most of my peers. While many of my classmates started dating in middle school or high school, I got started dating in college. My parents’ attitude to dating was that I should prioritize my education over romantic relationships. I was expected to focus on acing my entrance exams and ensure I was accepted to a high-ranking college instead of spending time with boys. Also, my living situation was not conducive to allowing friends or potential boyfriends to come to my house for visits. My parents’ turbulent marriage meant there was constant yelling at home and my mother’s PTSD-induced hoarding meant the house was strewn with items everywhere all the time. I also lived with my grandmother and aunts who were very nosy and would have asked about anyone who came to visit.
Another reason my parents were against relationships at the time was that they were very worried that I would make bad decisions and end up pregnant before I was ready. They had heard lots of news stories and were worried I could become a victim of rape. My grandmother…
